what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
