I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
