Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
