he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
