I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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