so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize