TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize