Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
