White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
