I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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