just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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