dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize
