you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
