fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize