yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
