Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
