Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize