Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
