In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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