I like my sex mixed with concussions.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
