Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
It's never too late to be topless.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
