WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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