Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
