This girl is more easily done than said...
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize