He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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