apparently the secret to your success is patron
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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