But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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