that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize