Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
