Is it normal to miss your booty call?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
