Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
