Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
