wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
