i think my tv is drunk
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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