Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
