awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
