No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize