I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
honey bunches of taint.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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