So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
