Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
