And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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