i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
