That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize