he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
