well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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