We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
