I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Hippo gnu deer
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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