Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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