I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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