my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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