What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize